november

it's been a long time since i posted.....i just didn't have any courage to do so...many things have happened over these few months....

You must get well for me....You promised to look after me! You have to be stronger than before and trust that God will heal you and restore your health...

try not to cough too hard, my love....you have been coughing phlegm with blood for almost 2 weeks and it is extreme.... i am worried sick over here....

i will fly to see you in december....i need to know the actual situation...i already applied the leave and book the flights, the only thing is i am on wait list both ways.....hopefully, all will turn out well.....

please.....i need you, you must win this battle....

Oh God, please have mercy and grace on him....heal him and let his testimony be Your glory....

it's a blue midweek

what was the slamdunk about? i am perplexed.....but i am not gonna stress myself from it....
whatever you may put or it could be your perception....i don't want to bother much...

yes, that bought me a little down but after much thoughts, i decided to drop the "baggage"...and free myself again...

sunshine will come after rain....the birds will start chirping again with melodies....

life is too beautiful....

blue blue go away.....bring back the happy colors into my life.....

passover friday....

stayed late in the office...i thought that i can paint the town red....

the backdrop will be changed after some reviews... it was decided on having images on canvas....so i need not carry on further, thanks God...otherwise, i won't have time for my other projects....

had a little chat with Erge, thanks for your advise...i know that i can count on you...

the winds are rather strong tonight, but there aren't any warnings....so it is probably a passing stream....shivers....

it's already 3.40am....i better crawl into my room, i miss my bed.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz......

enjoy the weekend...

Maids in HK

there are 2 recent cases about maids here :

1. maid was terminated by employer, but instead of sending her home immediately, they allowed her to stay over. Guess what? the maid fed the 9 months baby with milk and adding bleach....!!! good thing, the baby knew how to throw out and the granny made a report. Case is adjourned to next month for more hearing and verdict....baby is recuperating but there might be damages to the respiratory system. Hope that the baby can recover fully....sigh

2. maid was reprimanded by employer, she decided to take matters in her own way. she prepared meals but she used an extra ingredient....disgusting...she squeezed out of her sanitary pad!!! employer happened to walk into the kitchen....now the maid is charged for poisoning...hearing continues....

there are more stories and unbelievable ones too..... i get almost daily updates from mine....

We need their help but there doesn't mean that we can abuse them. They become part of the family....We must draw the line......

Yawnnnnn.....give me my bed please........

work gets in the way....

i am overwhelmed by work work work ever since i came back....when will work ease down? i just cleared closed to 300 emails on Tuesday itself, and i still see more!!! sometimes, i wished that we can have everyone on the same email....

and to have factories understanding those needs are a pain! every season is the same thingy, i had to explain and explain and explain......can't they be more committed??

to top that, personal emails can be a pain at times....I wondered why? Good thing i can handle the emotions...and most importantly, not to take it too personal. So i have to laugh it off even tho it hurts.....

gotta work again......the pile is rising.....

the headache

the headache carried on till the next day.....had to crawl out of bed to visit the doctor....how i hate it....sniff sniff.....i'm down with flu....it must be because of the weather....wierd....ouch, my shoulders are also aching and my legs are feeling wobbly....thanks God my chest is clear and my BP is normal....

i felt lousy.....i wished mummy was here....she would be the best person to look after me....

yawnnnnnnn.....even my arms are feeling heavy..... :(

i have yet to start on the backdrop for 4/25 dinner & dance....just managed to cut out the fabric, gotta start drawing out or else, we have nothing to show...yikes....another suggestion from xiao2mei is to project out from the lappy, but the effect won't be that great....how? how? how?

and we still haven't gotten enough stuff for the stage.....yikes...i forgot about the volcanoes!!!.

titleless

The burden is off....100%....and I feel great about it.....
isn't it amazing when you actually got the guts to say something out, then get it off the back after some back & forths.....lols

I have to celebrate!!!!

To a friend if he is going to read this : There is nothing to be shocked about....You are right, almost everyone went thru the thingy but who will let the other party know? maybe 40% out of the whole fraction....furthermore, there shouldn't be any motive, and the bottom line is I'd rather be a good friend to you and you already know the reason why...

6th April - Serayan's reunion and my 1st puppy love

Joining Facebook was 1 of the best thing I did. My primary school friend A found me. Isn't it amazing? And we are having a reunion this coming 6th. I was excited at first, but now I just want to crawl back into my shell. I don't know why...haha

I was beginning to know A & E (someone i couldn't remember at first, hehe) all over again. And I learnt that L went thru a patch too, but look, who didn't?? L was my 1st puppy love, but it's a 1 sided thingy....and i remembered that he used to kid with me, and from age 10, i always felt that he was around me spiritually....as years went on, L's images did flashed occasionally right up to now.

I called L after obtaining his mobile thru A. I had many things spinning around : what to say? will he remember me? I was going to speak to my puppy love!!! PUPPY LOVE......chuckle....

Arghhhhhhhhhhh, 5 times and he still wasn't picking up. I informed A via msn and she will try later. I tried again, and hey pesto, someone picked up......YES......it's him!!... we spoke for 19 minutes... He sounded cheerful....I was glad...I was....................Happy...

Anyhow, upon my return, I went for a head to toe pampering, wanting to look my best for the reunion. In 1 of the sessions, my beautician made an error on my face. I was dashed down and I text A, informing her that I might not come. How can such a thing happened at this moment.? A was trying to see how we can mend the error. I don't know how. I tried a trial touch up but it was obvious. I was disappointed. I badly wanted to go, and now I couldn't go.....

Mum encouraged me that I should attend. After all, it's been many years that we last saw each other. The hours/minutes/seconds came ticking. I was tight for time. I was behind my schedules. I had it all planned and now I rescheduled some appointments to meet the other.

Now, I was all set to go. The touch up was done, and only A knew.... We met eventually.... How we have grown! From a kid to an adult....From the way we talk in school to the way we carry ourselves in society today. Everyone had changed....Getting to know each other again. From wows, ohs, is it? These were the common words heard that night. And I wouldn't have recognise them if we walk past....

The only thing I didn't enjoy was the meal. It looked spicy for me. And it doesn't look appetizing to me. It wasn't signalling to the brains to eat. Hahaha....I guessed that I am pricky.....Anyhow, it was the company that matters. We were the last table to leave and we went on for coffee to catch up on good times. That night was also another eye opener for me to see how Sgp changed so much. It was my 1st for the places we went...What a mountain tortoise...

We wanted to meet up with Ah Poon, our Pri 6 form teacher. Sharon (she was married to him) called and he will be on his way. Ah Poon still looked good for his age! Wow!

The night ended so quickly as they need to work the next day except me....sniff sniff....We parted ways. I insisted that L sent me....hahaha....eh, hello? I wasn't the only one that tagged on to his car. So that didn't give me any chance to speak to him much. So that was it....

Somehow, I felt a burden inside me.....Something that I couldn't understand. It's been many years, although the images were still flashing, what was it? Another assignment? It beats me.....I want to lift this burden. I need the peace....God, help me......

Thank you God for this very special night.

Thank you A & E for taking time to call and contact the Serayans.

Thank you everyone for coming and sharing their time.....

I miss you all already....

Serayans at Merchant Court

At some coffee place.....I forgot the name.....

Left to Right : Alice, Li Li, Grace & Sharon

Left to Right : Leslie, Edmund & Terence....

Standing : Louis

Left to Right : Me, Leslie & Edmund

Left to Right : Li Li, Alice, Grace, Sharon, Me, Ah Poon & Terence

Standing behind : Leslie & Edmund

Sharon Chan - May 1964 to Feb 2009

Strickened by the horrible illness, Sharon left for a better place on an afternoon. How can it be? I was just chatting over the MSN 2 hours ago? I don't understand why but God had His plans. Sharon cannot suffer more than she should.

She was a good daughter, sister, sister in law, daughter in law, wife, mother, friend....Who would not shed tears for a person like her? Tears of sadness, tears of missing her, tears of feeling what was her last moments...

We used to argue when we were younger. But we never lay hands on each other. We only used Opera songs with sarcastic but harmless words towards each other.

Pope (pronounced Po-Pi) was your nickname as your phonetics were terrible...hahaha....Why? How? It's a secret....

Despite your suffering in recent months, you chose to handle it by yourself. I wondered at times are your kids aware? Did they notice that you have shrinked and become weaker? Each had their own world, what a pity. Did they know that side effects you went thru? I could only cry and feel the heartache....

You are a very brave woman. You are now enjoying in Paradise where you need not suffer anymore. Your job is done on Earth. Someday, the kiddos will understand why....

You remain in my heart forever.....my ba choo choo sister......

CNY is coming

Ooh, CNY is coming and I am going home to be with my wonderful family.
although it is a very short trip, i think that this year will be an enjoyable one.

things/stuffs/actions/food that i miss :
1. i miss mummy acting like big sister....hahahahaha...and go round and round and round in a circle game....remember that one??
2. i miss eating TOGETHER as 1 family.
3. i miss economical bee hoon with those taukwa, otak, eggs and a little dash of chilli...YUM YUM
4. i miss those drama laughters, giggles
5. i miss mum's nagging.....lols
6. i miss big sister's squint eyes...she always does that and then you can see her mouth pointy....
7. i miss 2nd sister's blinking eyes....she has that whenever she is sleepy...
8. i miss 2nd brother's talks....he is the 48, remember....
9. i miss dimples's whining
10. i miss pebbles' bark...she is still naughty
11. i miss playing mahjong and laughing until we all blushed....remember the bird and the flower?
12. i miss mum's cooking....
13. i miss being the pampered one at home...
14. i miss holding my family's hands...
15. i miss my room...
16. i miss nagging at my family too....hehehehe
17. i miss playing poker on the table....remember that CNY was always the bigger pool....lols
18. i miss those lovely pineapple tarts and not forgetting the delicious cake that Betty makes....drooling already
19. i miss all my nieces and nephews
20. i don't miss those creepy crawlers....yukes, stay away!
21. i miss the Burger King!!!! A must have at the airport....
22. i miss kuaychap, but i don't want anything but just those taupoks, eggs....i know, i know....i don't know how to eat the rest...
23. i miss nasi padang...oooh, tempeh, tauhu goreng, ikan, begedal...
24. i miss vadai, thoosai....big sister promised to buy me some when i come home...

the list can go on and on....Most of all, I miss my family so much and i can't wait to see them again.

A to Z

Hmmm, it's been lingering on my mind....must been kailui #1 influences....lols

So my next in line preferences are below....in case you want to sponsor me a gift, i'm listing it for easier references....lols lols lols

Anna Sui
Bvlgari
Courreges
Diamonds
Ebel
FCUK
Gianni Versace
Hermes
IWC
Juicy Couture
Kate Spade
Leroy
Moschino
Nina Ricci
Orlane
Piaget
Queens
Roberto Cavalli
Sarcar
Tods
Ungaro
Vera Wang or Vivien Westwood
Wittnauer
X - cannot think...maybe Xbox, but it is not really me...
YSL
Zodiac or Zenith
hahahahaha....look at how cheerful he was....i miss his smily smile.....

and i guess that i really miss the GOOD OLD DAYS with the 2 kailuis...

NT....when will i see you again?

hahahahahahahah.........took this when i was waiting for my turn at the hospital...

Hello, your paw ain't an ice cream.....

MD with his birthday cake??

Move away 08, come on 09

Wow.....I breaked and disappeared for a while....

Many happy and sad things waved up and down....soon it is byebye 2008 and welcome 2009...

1. He is awesome and only He can help and turn around situation - God

2. They are loving - Mum & Stepdad

3. They share the same blood - my siblings (Florence, Ricky & Sharon....not forgetting Georgie)

4. He's been with me since he was 3 or 4 yrs old - my Godson Mervyn

5. They are related - my nieces & nephews (Carolyn, Jaclyn, Shawn, Kenneth, Zachary)

6. They are my wonderful Kailuis - Hazel & Val

7. My wonderful friends - you, you, you, you, you, etc....& you....

Ok, what else to say or what's in store for 2009? Let's seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

1. Give more Thanks to Him

2. Have more quiet times with Him

3. My wonderful parents & siblings, always giving me encouragement when I am down, always sending SMS for those daily bread, so must try to spend quality time whenever possible

4. Thank my boss for holding my job still despite the economy crisis so better be nice to her

5. DIL, who is always lending her ears and sharing my sad or happy moments.

6. Save more, spend lesser....errrrrr, spend only when needed....

7. Nevertheless, need to thank my helper for easing the chores at home, and taking care of our meals

8. Pray for world peace and other's salvation

9. Good health for my family, friends and all around the globe

10. Better wisdom to handle situations

Here are the photos down in memory lane that i didn't post....

I was baptisted in ICA by Pastor Ken on August 24th. Mum, Big sister & Kenneth flew down to witness this wonderful day.

DIL, myself & Celing went for HH in Bordeaux to celebrate Celing's birthday.

He was grouchy because his owner woke him up when he was having a nap....hehe...

This plant is very unusual. I reckoned that the owner must have wired them together as it stands on 2 different pots.

Taken by me....nice, is it?.....now, i should get myself a real camera....lols

Someone commented that with this photo looking (censored ar), i can catch naive mens....hahaha....

Connie, myself and WingYan at Give Up Get Up by Nick Vujicic...Great inspiration and outreach. Many was saved! PTL......

See that little house? I think that it is still standing after more than 100 yrs on Lantau Island....My DIL doesn't know.....lols

This one kinda posed. Its nose is pinkish which reminded me of Patches.....It's probably 1 of Lantau Island's watchdog....hehehehe

These are salted eggs!! they get a good tan out in the sun. The only thing was the flies were tanning with the eggs.....yukes...

These are all twisted!! you can called this art or craziness....lols.....

And it covered the roof top too.....a closer look and you might think that snakes are there too...yikes....
This hound is so cute....so pampered....then it got tired and went back to nappy time....hehehe

You see a cat, right? well, it's feeding 1 of her kittens. But look at how protective she is. With her back ready to pounce on anyone. She was looking right to left...... And this is the first time that i saw a cat milking its kitten.....

And after a while, she decided to stop milking the little one. And we didn't noticed that there were 2 more others at the back....

A nice Christmas card from my wonderful family...of course, mummy wrote it personally....haha

A cute Panda!!! no chance for me to hug as there were kiddos around...so who will get the better chance? hehehe

Christmas carolling between Pier 5 to 6....

See the guy in red cap & blue polo....it's my favorite handsome looking pastor Ed....

1st word dawns

the 1st word that dawned :

Ahhhhhhhhh

Boring

Cat

Dimples

Eggplant

Family

God

Hahaha

Indigo

Jealous

Kite

Love

Mindao

North Pole

Ocean

Panama

Quincy

Race

Sleep

Teeth

Uniform

Victory

Work

X-ray

Yawn

Zodiac

#### it's simple yet from those words, it can tell what is really on your mind....give each alphy no longer than 5 seconds to think....

Will you be just yourself?

Here I am, yawning again and again......

oh why, do you want to follow? don't you realise that it is getting annoying? in the 1st place, you are not that person. You are who you are. Don't try to impress because it is too fake...

everyone has a personality...when there are changes, it should be the inner self. Not by acting like that person. It is different and what are you trying to prove? i don't get it....Sorry for being blunt. These are facts.

The "slap"

What a "slap" on my face. You totally misunderstood my actual concern. What is the actual point when others asked you a question like that?

We are wanting to walk this trial together but you are the one who is rejecting it. I really don't know what else I can do. In fact, I am the last person to know what is going on because I purposedly didn't want to ask you anything for the last few weeks, thinking that you will update you. But I was wrong. You became upset with others questions and also put me into the picture.

I know that you are upset about the whole issue, but WHO ISN'T? You bottled up all by yourself but it will not help.

Like I said earlier, whenever you think that you want to tell me, I'm open.

Don't be a hero by yourself. There are many others waiting with open arms to help too.

long time no see.....

haven't been blogging for more than a month....almost forgot my pw...hehehe....

yawnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn, what to write now....all seemed fine except for some fallen pieces during the month...

i'm just staring at the frame, thinking of what to tell...ok, maybe i should start about my trip home.....and what i had observed...no offences to some, it's just my thoughts about it....

Ah Bah - i am worried as he is getting forgetful. i am grateful for the help that he gave mum before. Can you all understand? stop nagging, showing faces, scolding him....we must appreciate him. At home, no one talks to him....isn't it sad? when i grow old and forgetful, i pray that i don't be in other people's way or annoy them...

Mum - rabbit will always be the rabbit...but say what we like, she is still mum. We never know what her real thoughts are. She braved many times in front but no one noticed. deep inside, she must be feeling down...she probably bypass the sadness and chose to be naive which in return posed an annoyance to some others...

Tajie - a strong pillar for the family...despite of her naughty character, she does care. Even if it meant shortening her beauty sleep, she didn't mind. Probably her approach can bring hurt to some others. Looking at the way she treats her Don-don, tajie certainly's got a soft spot for the weak...haha

Erge - NATO, still the same....I seldom interact with him over these years except now. He was nice enough to call me when i arrived home....only hope that he will spend more time with the family instead of his dogs....hehe....

Erjie - i don't know what to say but i have to respect her wishes. She doesn't want to worry others especially Peter and the kiddos. Kiddos are still kiddos...they have their own minds, not realizing the seriousness of an issue. Anyway, pray that all is fine. She needs to eat more often to build the immune and maybe bring back some weight. Not sure if she understands. Maybe she is just eating the regular meal schedule....sigh...

Carolyn - it was only a glance. It seemed like a "Hello Yiyi" and that was it. No other conversation was made. It could be my years abroad so she is not too close to me....i cannot expect too much....As long as she can look after her mum, i should be thankful...

Jaclyn - this little princess seemed to be experiencing the unwanted. Is it too much for her to take at her age? she looked strong but deep inside, I can imagine her weakness. But i believe that she can cope with those.

Shawn - huge!! saw him twice. Once downstairs while he was on his way to school and another time up at his place. We seemed like strangers....doesn't seem to have a aunty-nephew bond. Could it be that I threw my attention to Mervyn and ignore Shawn. How could i have done that? I should have been fair to all my nephews and nieces....

Mervyn - From a very tiny boy, he now overtook my height...hahaha....I remembered how he used to massage my head when having headaches....he was a smiley boy...I want him to be happy and smile more...He would run from the elevator to my place and with the sweet cute voice, he would popped his head and say : Gan Ma.......hohohoho....memory lane...

Kenneth - big boy now....i cannot imagine how we used to fight when he was a boy...yes, i was jealous of this baby...hahahaha.....grandparents doted on him so much....i hope that he will return them with gratitude....they were always protecting him.

Zachary - chubby looking boy....he is really nice deep down. Get to know him, and you will agree. Those games played together with Tajie and him was simply hilarious....and the amount of sweets we got, it is enough to filled 3 bags!

wow, it is 10.30pm and i'm still here.......good thing is a holiday tomorrow.....i want to slack.....hahahahhahaha

haven't written about some others yet...will do so another time....

Right Here With You

"Don't give up, here we are, and if you need a helping hand, we're gonna be right here with you.
You're not alone, we have been there too, we understand what you go through, we wanna be right here with you....."

I recorded some 20 something songs specially for No.4....these songs will help her thru this trial.....These songs were pre-listened, going thru lyrics after lyrics, to ensure that these are the suitables.....


I am going home to spend quality time even though it is a short trip. I can make more trips. I want to forget about work for now and think more for my family.

Over the recent months, I learnt to be more independant than before. I realized that I can be alone enjoying without that special person around. That special person no longer hold my candle and vice visa. Give me more time and I can confirm it definite.

Ah, got to buy some Chocopie for the kids....How many boxes? What else? No need for big coin chocolates, so what to buy??? hmmmmmmmm........got to think fast, haven't got much time to shop around....hehehehe......

Yawn, I didn't sleep well due to the thunder and lightning....I shall get a eye mask soon....hahahaha....

I am hungry nowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww..........it's mum mum time! yippee!

An encouragement for No.4 - Sharon Chan

When we feel we have nothing left to give, and we are sure that the song has ended. When our day seems over and the shadows fall and the darkness of night has descended. Where can we go to find the strength, to valiantly keep on trying? Where can we find the hand that will dry, the tears that the heart is crying?

There's but one place to go and that is to God, and dropping all pretense and pride, we can pour out our problems without restraint, and gain strength with Him at our side. And together we stand at life's crossroads and view what we think is the end, But God has a much bigger vision, And He tells us it's only a bend.

For the road goes on and is smoother, and the pause in the song is a rest, and the part that's unsung and unfinished, is the sweetest and richest and best.
So rest and relax and grow stronger ...Let go and let God share your load. Your work is not finished or ended ...You've just come to a bend in the road.

Sis, you are 1 of God's precious child....Go to Him....Only He can help....Only thru Him, you will find peace, comfort.....Only thru Him, you can be healed....

08242008

This is the day that The Lord Hath Made for me. I was finally baptisted in ICA.

Appreciate lots for coming to witness this day, my thanks goes to :

God, Mum, Florence, Kenneth, Cynthia, Ina, Clinton, Sandy, Nancy, Carolyn, Celing, Vivien, Bernard, Connie, Donna, Margaret, Elaine, WW, Ben, Millie, Sheila, Hui Hui, Simon, Rani, Linda, Ken, Amanda...oops, who else? Yes, and all at home.....

New life, new beginning.....God will be the footprints in the sand....

I had a big bag of goodies flown from home. Yummy stuff! Thanks family!!

Day by day

Even after a week's stay, there are still roaches!!! why why why? the fumigation was done but seemed that it is not working.....I wonder......

I had a good cry last sunday. I had never experienced such...I really sobbed...My face towel was soaked.....I need Him so badly. I need Him to carry me one more time. The message was clear : Live life deeply, Live my day as it is the last....

Day by day, I am beginning to understand God and His purpose. Day by day, I am learning. Day by day, I long to be nearer to Him. Day by day, I sang until my tears are formed. Day by day, I understand why He had to die for us. Day by day, I grew a little understanding, a little learning, a little nearer......

I come to understand that obstacles will make me stronger. I must thank Him, not blame Him. He has been molding me all these while. He is the footprints in the sand...

I got myself a nice speaker for the nano which I intend to use it for the room. It is reasonable and that is why I decided to buy. My curtains are customed made and already paid, so that is another debt off my list....

I am getting excited about my room. I want it to be as cosy as ever....I must write down my wish list for my friends.....hehehehe....

Bed, bed, are you ready yet? I cannot wait to sleep on you!!!

Did you notice my new song for my blog?